Episode #351: Common OBSTACLES to Being Healthy and How to Overcome Them

Hey there friends how’s it going? Welcome to today’s episode of the healthy habit moms podcast. I am super happy to be here with you today as we talk about problem solving obstacles for our health and fitness. This is something that I think I just do on a personal level very often with clients and friends that purchase conversational things come up. And, you know, obviously, in that scenario, I’m typically the one trying to come up with some solutions, which we’re going to talk about today. But that’s friendship, that’s life. That’s motherhood. That’s all the things where so often I’m in the other seats. I’m saying, like, I am just running into this, like, Does anybody else have what do you do for this and just talking things out and walking away with maybe a fresh perspective, at least like some sometimes to like women or external processors, we just need to say it out loud. And we’ll come to the solution ourselves. You don’t even need someone to say it. But it kind of makes a light bulb go off in our head. So maybe some of these things as we work through them today will pop out to is like yeah, I really have been letting that be an excuse or that is a reality. That’s like a fact. But I didn’t realize this alternative solution to it. Weird example. But just the other day, I was in a weird spot, where I’ve actually not been doing grocery pickup and forever I’ve been going to the stores because with, you know, inflation and all that jazz that’s still around, I have been wanting to get the most out of my money just in the store. I know there’s lots of different feelings on this, I actually, I’ve done a couple episodes on ways to reduce grocery costs. And when I initially I know the maybe not the first episode I ever did on it. But my more previous episode, I had shared as a money saving tip, doing grocery pickup so that you could monitor your cart as you added things. And you know, stay within it helps me to not grab those last minute items. I avoid that all the aisle where you come home with like a new bath mat. And like a weird kitchen appliance, you don’t really need lots of other cute stuff. Like I get a lot of cute stuff in that aisle. But Case in point, there’s like an extra 30 bucks on when I go to all the and I go in the bio. But then my more recent of whatever episode it is, I don’t know what the title but there was something about saving money groceries I actually shared with all of you that I have not been doing that not been doing any grocery pickups because the I was just finding that the markups were so high, I just wanted my you know dollar to stretch as far as it could and it killed me then I’m like, I know this is $1 cheaper in the store, or 40 cents cheaper and whatever per item really adds up. And I’m like, I just need to suck it up and go on the store and make you know, these dollars go into the groceries not just in the convenience of the pickup. But anyway, all that to say is I’m not done pickup in a while. But I was in a position where I was staying with my sister’s kids for a couple days. So I had like their three and our three plus the baby and my belly obviously. And it was like that for a couple of days. And then once we were switching back to her house in a very like quick little timetable like, switch back to our house, bring my son to Taekwondo, go drop off a car with my husband at the mechanics like then I was not going to have a car for at least two days. So I was looking at the fact that we were not going to have groceries and I kind of panicked because I forgot about the car drop off situation until the day before we did it. Like how what am I going to do here because we’re going to go home and have zero groceries for like two days, no milk, no anything. So we haven’t been here for five days. Anyway, I’m like Brittany, like just go to a grocery pickup. So instead of schlepping six kids into the store six kids under six. I don’t even know how I would have done it. I know it’s obviously possible but I did not want to try to do that. So I went into the grocery pick up because that I can do with kids and they live close to us so that you know obviously that only worked because of that so I dropped the groceries at my house, my back and respecters etc and moved on but sometimes we can really just sit in our problem and not see any solution at all like there is no solution happening. And that is where I encourage you if I don’t happen to talk about your specific obstacle right now talk it out with a friend talk it out with your husband because your say that sometimes my husband was even have to say anything I just had to like state the problem and toss it out there or he or he doesn’t really encourage me well sometimes where I cannot see my way out of that problem. Like he probably would have seen that in a second but like could you just pick up some or you know like because you haven’t even delivered at that point like obviously we’re not usually spending the money on that but like in that scenario where that’s all you can do also at the time of recording this the our vacation would have already happened but we have a I’m gonna make this episode all about grocery pickup, but we have a vacation coming up at the time of recording this that’s already passed by the time you’re here. In it, and it’s always a weird time, like by the time we drive down, get where we’re going. It’s always like dinner time. And we just want to get there. And we’re getting there on a Saturday. And then our first beach day is a Sunday. But we also need to go to Mass and grocery shop like all this stuff. So we I wonder how this actually went by the time you guys are listening to this, but now, we were trying to problems all this before it came up. Because we’ve done this for several years where we’re like, okay, we always get there, everyone’s starving. We, you know, want to check in and stuff, but we want to grocery shop, but whatever, all this stuff. So one year, we’ve gone like, I’ve gone to the grocery store, like eight o’clock at night, while he’s like set up the condo, and the kids and stuff where we all kind of unload. And then he’s in there setting up and I go, or last year what we did was just went to church on Sunday went grocery shopping after but then we you know, missed like half of each day. I don’t think we even went to the beach by that time, because it’s like naptime. You know, the whole thing. So our plan this year is we talked it out, but it took us talking out. I got the idea of the grocery delivery. So we’ll see again, this comes to fruition, but I was like then we can probably get groceries delivered to the condo so that it’s like get there, get groceries delivered, which is again more than what we usually splurge on but we’re on vacation like it’s gonna be alright, save that time. And could we possibly leave like an hour earlier and hit a Saturday vigil mass because usually we roll in like right in time for the vigil. So our game plan, I will have to I’m never gonna remember to pour back on it. So maybe I’ll tell you guys on Instagram or something when it happens. But you’ll be hearing this after. So whatever our game plan is leave a little bit earlier than we usually do. And in the wee hours of morning, so that we can hopefully catch the vigil mass, get our groceries delivered, just feel absolutely on top of the world. So that we can go take like a beach walk and get dinner. But then we’re set up with food and we’ve seen the Lord and then Sunday, just head right to the beach, we’ll see how it goes. Anyway, that was a really long tangent story to tell you. This is what we need to do sometimes is just problem solve. Alright, let’s get into your examples that is probably more appropriate to like, rather than your vacation hurdles of grocery mass dilemma. You’re probably here for a little more like, you know, you can’t get a workout in kind of thing. But first, I just want to say, and this is always the first step in figuring out solutions to my own problems or asking others for help them on problems is it we, I you me? We’re not victims, okay, we are in control of so much in our lives. And there’s a lot I know that we’re not in control of if we hit traffic or the grocery place, like delivers our groceries the wrong place. Like there’s, you know, there’s room for error and a lot of places here. But you’re in control really like coming up with these solutions, being proactive about things. This is what we need to do, like have some critical thinking and I know some of you are listening to this who are way older way seasoned that way more seasoned and experienced and I am more thinking like Brittany, yes, I’ve been doing this for years, my kids are all grown etc. And that’s awesome. And I, you’re the kind of people that I usually go to for help on things like that, like, Well, what do I do for this? Or what do I do for this? But this is what we need to just take ownership of like when there are real obstacles or real excuses. Like my husband works crazy hours, I can’t go to the gym like okay, doesn’t mean because you can’t go to the gym, you can’t work out at all. Or because you get no help with the kids. You can’t eat healthily. Or, you know, there’s a lot of things that we maybe can’t control. Or, you know, God had other plans in like how close together your babies are, that’s a big one I relate. He’s like, Well I like they sit in that for a long time like well now I’m overweight and I have all this fat to lose because I was gonna lose it after the first baby but we got pregnant again so quickly and we weren’t trying to you know, whatever. There’s still so much that Okay, great things happen. Like let’s look at where you are right now and problem solved from there. So number one, look at your situation, assess whether or not you can or should change something and then figure out the best situation for what you are left with. Okay, so I have an example for you for this. So in a perfect world my absolute like ideal time to work out in scenario and environment everything would be to wake I like morning but I like to like wake up at like six.

Honestly, that would be my ideal wake up time. I usually have to force myself to get up at like five just to fit our lifestyle but say I wake up at six I do my prayer. If coffee I have a meal in there. Then I go to the gym say eight or nine when I’m up and I’m peppy and I have energy and I do my workout at the gym by myself with my headphones in. Okay, that would be my ideal. Now my reality is that I have a husband who works much earlier than that, um, you know, I can’t do exactly that. But then I can problem solve solutions like I could get a gym membership that has childcare, I could definitely do that my kids are not in school, they’re homeschooled, we could go to the gym, mom could do her workout at 8am. Or when childcare opens, then we could come home and do our school day. That’s absolutely a solution we could do. I could go super early before my husband goes into work, I have done that and other seasons of life, I could go later, after bedtime. Or when my husband gets home, if we don’t have kids activities, where we’re jetting out and doing it before dinner, right after dinner or something, I could find a way to do it at home, I could find a way that I like to do it at home, even if it’s not my preference by finding like a video I really like or an app I really like or program I really like whatever. These are all solutions to our obstacle. Okay, because right now the obstacle might be I can’t work out because I can’t go to the gym at 8am with my headphones in and do the workout I want to do. No, I can’t. Like, okay, so what can I do? What is the next best thing, what is going to get a workout in, in a way that I will like, what is the most enjoyable way that I can so for me personally, you know, that is just, again, there’s different seasons, I mentioned, I used to go super early for my husband to work a couple days a week, do the other ones at home, whatever. Currently, it works best for me for my schedule to do it in the morning, before the day starts, get me going with energy before our homeschooling day and all that stuff and all the other things we have going on. And to do it from home is just the easiest quickest. And the way I like to do it is really just getting in there and doing it. Okay, sometimes I’ll throw on a show in the background, sometimes a follow along something, whatever. But that’s how I’ve chosen to kind of get to there. Okay, another one I hear a lot though is I don’t know what to do. Okay, I either don’t know what to do, or I don’t have money to invest in figuring out what I should be doing. Like I can’t do one of your programs Bernie or another program because you know, money’s type of loss would have to be from home, but I don’t know what to do. Okay. Problem solving, start with free resources. There are so many resources out there in this way. I just do encourage you to find people that you know, are reputable, that you trust and then consume their free content. Like, there’s so much you can do. Example of this is you know, for healthy Catholic moms, I have done so many things through freebies when I started this podcast, it was on Pat Flynn, if anyone’s interested in making a podcast you had this like free PDF or webinar or something, I think it was a PDF thing was a guide. I remember reading it, I probably have it downloaded on my computer. So I went to Barnes and Noble for like two hours on a night that my husband was home or a Saturday don’t remember, I said hey, I think that I want to do a podcast. And it’d be a great way I think to get free content out to women who are you know, wanting to grow their health and fitness because this is when a little after I had my son in 2017. And that is when I started listening to podcast. So it took me I mean, I was listening to podcasts for about two years and was like, okay, like, can I really do this, you know, you have the whole, like, who am I to have a microphone and do this. And that’s normal, that’s natural. That’s everybody. And that was totally me. Like, that’s gonna be really weird. Like, I can’t tell my friends and family, I have a podcast. And now like several years later, some of my friends family been on the podcast. But um, you know, I could not invest in a coach for that or have even a course for that. I’m not making money off his pot, because I’m still not making money off his podcast, they don’t take ads, like, you know, I just knew I needed to get something going in a cost effective way. And by cost effective. I mean, like zero. My hosting site is like $12 to do this the place where I’ve been okay. So I use somebody’s free guide to do it. So you there’s always, you know, workarounds for most things if if cost is an issue. Okay, another really common obstacle, my house is a mess. No one helps me. I’m always behind. Okay, pause it. Again, you’re going to kind of assess the situation whether or not you can or should change something. So houses a mess. How can how can we change that? Can we put some systems into place so that you don’t feel like that so you don’t feel like you’re always behind and overwhelmed. Like for me, that came down to like setting specific days for specific things knowing that I always wash the sheets on Thursdays or if I don’t because you know, life happens. I do it the next day but have Being a system and a time and a place for these things, maybe you need to delegate some of the work. So maybe like just stopping and looking at that, like, how can I change this or what what should be changed? Sometimes we just need to step back and be like, Oh, well, my kids are like 10, eight, six, and nobody does any chores. Maybe I can have the 10 year old start folding the towels everyday, or whatever my six year old holds the towels, I don’t know, whatever you want to do my tenure, I was gonna leave the dishwasher every day. Or maybe I need to delegate this asked my husband, if you could take this on? Or if we could do this, or maybe we have like, as you’re problem solving this look at the situation like why is it always a mess, you also have so much stuff that you guys don’t need. Maybe you all need to take like a weekend or a Saturday and declutter some stuff, get rid of stuff, like, we just have to stop and pause and not be stuck in the problem backup and find a solution. That’s another big one I hear all the time for why people can’t work out is because they don’t have time because there’s always housework to do. Or when they have a free minute. They don’t know if they should be doing housework, or if they should be working out or what they should be doing. You know? And, like systems, I’m telling you the answer there, because then you don’t feel guilty when you are, you know, doing something else. Like you know, there’s a time and place you’re gonna get to that. There’s like, you know, caveat and things we could talk about there to where I CS Lewis, I think I might have even talked about some on the podcast, but I think it’s in The Screwtape Letters were CA’s csosa saying like, you know, if I wanted to rip apart family, I’m heavily paraphrasing here, I would, you know, make sure that I encouraged the man to sit down, put his feet up at the end of a long workday and have some recreation time. But I would make sure that the woman, you know, can never rest and always has to look around for something to do so that she resents the man for doing that, and this and that. And I was like, wow, this is extremely relatable not saying my husband helps out a ton does a ton of stuff. Like it’s, you know, that’s not my point here. But that’s how I feel is like, Oh, I’m never going to be done. So I also think there’s an element to needing to realize like, alright, and sometimes we hang our head up. And we say that today, like that day is done. And you know what, my floors are not clean, but it’s alright. Like, I would rather go read a book for half hour than clean my floors right now, because they’re just gonna get messy tomorrow. So there’s also a healthy balance there. All right. Let me see what else I’ve got for you. Um, okay, one more example, I guess of this is when I sat in for a while, have me be a victim and making myself a victim. This is not necessarily in health and fitness. But this was just in general, I was very annoyed by and stressed out by the fact that I don’t really always know my husband’s day to day work scheduled work hours, because he does not either his work very much fluctuates depending on what’s going on that day with the guys on his team and this and that and getting to cover things and being on the road or being in the office or whatever. And that was a big stress point and pain point for me for a while of like, okay, I already don’t like feeling out of control. And then I am totally out of control of this. And there’s so much up in the air of like, Well, are you going to be able to take Josh to taekwondo? Or am I going to be able to leave at 430 and go to a coffee shop and work for a couple hours? Like, there’s all the things like we couldn’t plant we can’t currently still plan anything for sure. Then I just had to realize like Brittany, this is not changing. Like if he’s not changing occupations or changing, you know, some things, this is not in the foreseeable future changing. And there are so many other positive elements of his job and things he enjoys. And I enjoy and his job provides us you know, benefits and security and all these things. And I need to look at what I can control for me. That was I just need to plan the days based on like, him not being in the picture, which sounds really terrible, as I say it, but you know, you’ve got to, I could sit in that forever, like, well, this person can you know, their person like their husband works from home so they can run out at naptime and grocery shop or they could go run errands or like, well if he was home, even just in my own life, like then, okay, well, if he makes it home, he could take Josh I can do like no, I just had to take that off the table. So I’m pleasantly surprised when he can do something when we can make something work like that. So I just have to think like if it’s a day, Josh, my oldest has taekwondo. I just know I’m taking right now the other two little kids with me. It’ll be three little kids soon. And I just know that’s what’s gonna happen. Like, we have taekwondo today and we’re gonna go there tonight and I’ll bring a couple books and toys and then I’ll come home and then Ben will be home and we’ll do our night and did a lot and obviously too I also need to say like my husband works like crazy person to try to make it to things So this took stress off him and off me because he like would not take lunch break is like driving around eating a ramp with one hand like taking full On calls, like, he hooks it to try to get home for like these kinds of events. But sometimes it’s just, you know, like, it’s just the way the day went and what he had to do. So it made it better for both of us to just be like, Nope, you know what, we just got to run things like, it’s on me until you’re home. And then, you know, obviously, like big things, five, something like eight o’clock at night, I know he’s gonna make it home for that kind of thing. But that gave me so much more freedom, joy, and whatever in the know, did I change my life? Could I change the actual situation and circumstance that was stressful to me? No, the fact remains that I don’t know my husband’s schedule the day. But I just needed to take ownership of that, and then plan it to the best of my ability with him out of the picture like that. Okay. I’m laughing because as I was, I kind of look ahead at my outline. Sometimes as I’m talking, and I looked ahead, I wrote this out a couple of weeks ago. And sometimes I write my outlines out pretty strong. And then I temper them when I read them, like I do, just write them like it’s a note to myself. And then I say it in a nicer manner. But I don’t know how to really soften this and I do feel like I need to just say it I’m just gonna read it how I wrote it. You can judge me from there. From wherever you’re listening. Oh, pretty really soften that I could have but that’s not really my personality. I am pretty point blank. And take your leave it you know, but this is my last note for you. Today. I’m problem solving our obstacles to our health and fitness is I really wrote this. I can’t listen to people. I guess I can, I will listen to you. But I don’t have much patience for people. I will say that. I can’t listen to people who want to sit on their pity throne and pontificate about how things would be easier. If in all caps, they had equipment in their house, if they had more money for a trainer. If they had more time in the day. If fill in the blank, then I stop iffing all over the place. It’s like, kind of vulgar sounding, but it’s really not. And figure out what to do with what you have. All right, I’m gonna leave you with that beautiful poetic sentence stop iffing. But it’s true. Ladies, this is like just, you know, the core of it is sometimes we just want to have the pity party. We just want people to agree with us and say, Yeah, that’s so hard. Like that is so hard that your husband works 24 hour shifts. Mine doesn’t. But I’m just saying For example, I’m like, Yeah, I wouldn’t be able to get my workout in either. No, don’t be that friend. Don’t be the person be the person who’s like, ah, that is tough. Like you are in a hard situation. What if you and then come up with solutions? I think that is such a big cultural thing with all the self care and all the like poor me, woe is me crap. I’m not saying self care, as well as me. And I just did an episode on the importance of self care. But I’m saying like, we really like to do the commiserate like, oh, man, that is hard. That doesn’t make anybody feel better, right? What we need is like to look for solutions and not just sit in our excuses and be like, This is the worst. It’s not helpful. If you’re sitting down in a ditch for someone to walk by and be like that. I’m really sorry, you’re in that ditch, like that stinks. No, like, give me your hand and help me find a way out of it. Help me figure out a way I don’t even know you don’t have to help me out of it. Just say like, Hey, there’s a stick right there. Like, try that out. And then you know, the person can get out of the ditch or not. And that’s how I feel about a lot of these things is like, there are real obstacles. There are real issues. There are real facts. But we can either sit on them, dwell in them, blow them out of proportion, get people to agree with us about how hard they are. Or we can figure it out and keep moving with what we do have. All right. I’m gonna regret later that I read that on here, but I hope you liked it. Share it with somebody, you know, we got to just tell people the truth. All right, have a great rest of your day. Ladies, I appreciate you being here. And next time. I’m very, very excited about next episode. I have not talked about this before on this podcast. We’re gonna talk about foods to eat for a better mood. So talking about different hormones, and what they do for us briefly what they do for us, but more importantly, what foods we can eat to get some of these feel good, happy hormones. So literally making it easier for us to be happy. I’m pumped about that. All right, I’ll talk to you then have a great rest of your day.

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